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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2020 15:16:39 GMT
I'm quite intrigued by this idea.
Due to the taxman knocking at the door, certain slightly illegal financial holdings, owning too many boats and questions around my future MI6 employment I have decided to investigate faking my own death.
Just to get away from it all.
Has anyone tried this ?
I know it might be a bit bad for the kids but I'm sure they will understand.
It's got to be better than doing it for real !!
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Post by thebfg on Aug 9, 2020 15:22:35 GMT
Pretty sure your not serious but, if anyone is financially rewarded and you are caught not even MI5 will be able to save you from jail time
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2020 16:40:02 GMT
Google John Darwin - it doesn’t always go to plan!
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Post by greenman on Aug 9, 2020 16:45:40 GMT
It worked for Reggie Perrin.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2020 16:53:28 GMT
Pretty sure your not serious but, if anyone is financially rewarded and you are caught not even MI5 will be able to save you from jail time No it's nothing to do with insurance or anything just getting away from the system for a while. I would never consider doing something like that for money. That would be wrong. And it's MI6 not 5 and I have some pretty good contacts in the South Oxfordshire HQ.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2020 17:21:45 GMT
Inheritance tax will take 40% over £340k?, You will need to make a will or it all goes to your siblings etc. Far more financial complications.
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Post by metanoia on Aug 9, 2020 17:22:31 GMT
I've managed to hide from the system so successfully that even the DWP refuse to give me a pension estimate (moved forward 3 then 5 then 8 years) because apparently I don't exist (only worked since I was 12 and paid NI from 1970something)......
Sadly they forgot they didn't recognise me three years ago when I cashed in a private pension and they took 25%!
Good luck - it's obviously not what you know, but who ...
Keep safe x
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2020 17:26:58 GMT
Inheritance tax will take 40% over £340k?, You will need to make a will or it all goes to your siblings etc. Far more financial complications. Bearing in mind I have no money I don't think that is going to be a major issue here ETA the kids do know that despite our wonderfully comfortable family background they will get four fifths of five eighths of fuck all of the family money because I bought a Benetti super yacht for £750,000 cash and it turned out to be someone else's boat. Money gone in the blink of an eye. You live and learn. In theory!
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Post by metanoia on Aug 9, 2020 17:29:02 GMT
eta... ....back to the op... Perhaps if you leave a few empty cans on the "platform" you'll be fine!!!
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2020 17:31:47 GMT
eta... ....back to the op... Perhaps if you leave a few empty cans on the "platform" you'll be fine!!! I did think about the trains but that was more of a "non fake" type of death. I am specifically looking at ways to fake my own death. Not for financial reward, not for fame or anything like that but it just seems an interesting thing to do.
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Post by patty on Aug 9, 2020 17:36:26 GMT
All that planning? All that hassle? Gotta be desperate to consider it... me I reckon I'd just go away in my car, switch off the phone and hideaway somewhere where none of my lot would find me....
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Post by metanoia on Aug 9, 2020 17:39:09 GMT
eta... ....back to the op... Perhaps if you leave a few empty cans on the "platform" you'll be fine!!! I did think about the trains but that was more of a "non fake" type of death. I am specifically looking at ways to fake my own death. Not for financial reward, not for fame or anything like that but it just seems an interesting thing to do. Sorry - you misunderstood - I was referring to your beer drinking platform. However, with my unfortunate name I will leave you in peace... Take care x
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Post by Mr Stabby on Aug 9, 2020 19:20:50 GMT
eta... ....back to the op... Perhaps if you leave a few empty cans on the "platform" you'll be fine!!! I did think about the trains but that was more of a "non fake" type of death. I am specifically looking at ways to fake my own death. Not for financial reward, not for fame or anything like that but it just seems an interesting thing to do. Well, drowning is traditionally the way to do the "fake suicide" thing as it is to be expected that there will be no body to be found and identified, as opposed to, say, coercing some random tramp into laying on a railway line with your passport in his pocket where their DNA and dental records might give the game away. The trouble is though, that the Filth are equally aware of this and view shoreline disappearances with grave suspicion. Of course, you could just move to some remote village cottage in the arse end of, say, Ukraine and then seldom if ever venture outdoors but obviously this is fraught with logistical problems, such as obtaining provisions. However, since such a place is unlikely to be internet-connected, and younger, more tech-savvy people are prone to move away to Kiev at the earliest opportunity leaving only an elderly population of dim-witted peasants behind, you might get away with it for a while if you made no banking transactions and had no other connection with your former identity.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2020 19:54:02 GMT
Its really simple. Move to Paraguay but avoid photo shoots.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2020 20:50:59 GMT
I think the disappearing off shore thing might work.
The only time any of my boats have touched salty water with me on them was when the potatoes boiled over but there are always new things to try.
I doubt disappearing in an inland waterway will work.
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