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Post by Deleted on Aug 16, 2018 18:03:19 GMT
Today I was reminded of an alleged Mark Twain quotation:
"I take whisky every night as a preventative against toothache. I've never had the toothache, but nor do I intend to."
It's always made me smile.
Any other amusing quotes that tickle your funny bone?
Rog
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Post by Deleted on Aug 16, 2018 18:05:24 GMT
No idea who WC Fields was (quite funny initials) but I like this one
Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. W. C. Fields
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Post by Mr Stabby on Aug 16, 2018 18:06:44 GMT
“I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”- Also Mark Twain.
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Post by Mr Stabby on Aug 16, 2018 18:08:00 GMT
Also this, from Upton Sinclair- "It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends upon his not understanding it”.
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Post by Mr Stabby on Aug 16, 2018 18:09:59 GMT
Or this- "The problem with quotes found on the internet is that many of them are not true"- Abraham Lincoln.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 16, 2018 18:15:12 GMT
“The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.” - someone
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Post by Deleted on Aug 16, 2018 18:23:38 GMT
"Because it's there" - Mallory.
Now a polite way of saying stop asking stupid questions.
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Post by Mr Stabby on Aug 16, 2018 18:34:11 GMT
"Because it's there" - Mallory.
'He never does the washing up "because it's there"'- Mrs Mallory. |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 16, 2018 18:44:09 GMT
Adulthood is hell.
HP Lovecraft
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Post by ianali on Aug 17, 2018 6:37:33 GMT
I have a beer mate with a Mark Twain quote written on it.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 17, 2018 8:37:43 GMT
“I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”- Also Mark Twain. I use that when people are insistent that ‘once they are dead they are dead.and will never live again’. How do we know we didn’t have a life before this one...eh? After all different brain, so no memory of any previous life |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 17, 2018 8:42:08 GMT
Many years ago a lovely old chap left me these words of wisdom...”Don’t let the bastards get you down’ ;-)
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Post by Deleted on Aug 17, 2018 8:52:08 GMT
That was one of my late mother's favourites. Eta except she used the word "buggers" instead of "bastards" because the word "bastard" is offensive.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 17, 2018 8:52:49 GMT
I have a beer mate with a Mark Twain quote written on it. Is it a tattoo? |
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Post by patty on Aug 17, 2018 9:03:27 GMT
I like quotes ..I have a collection scrawled in a book somewhere..
When I was really bad with what happened they guided my life and provided inspiration to just keep on going..
dunno where the book is but no doubt my mass declutter/chuck n sort will unearth all sorts of treasures..so if this thread is still weaving I'll be adding my input then
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