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Post by metanoia on Mar 22, 2017 18:56:08 GMT
No contest, Mr B.....
A girl (snigger!) will always expect you to (a) - naturally!
Very good luck, whatever!
Met cx
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Post by phil70 on Mar 22, 2017 21:48:46 GMT
Edit for fut funger
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Post by phil70 on Mar 22, 2017 21:51:13 GMT
Loafer should graciously bow to the inevitable and with a willing spirit just do whatever Mrs Loafer suggests. Failure to comply will result in an extended sojourn in the Cratch and a full retraction of privileges' which could remain in force for a loooong time.
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Post by loafer on Mar 23, 2017 1:01:33 GMT
'Bugger' sighed Loafer.
'Just bugger. This means a more delicate approach than I had planned. OK it's my round - but I want IDEAS, people!' He exclaimed.
'If I give into this, then where would it end? She'll want a walk-through bathroom next, thereby throwing away all that effort in 2015/16 fixing the shower grouting. Can we just take the punt back to the Med while she thinks about it?'
'Burp' said Phil.
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Post by phil70 on Mar 23, 2017 1:42:14 GMT
Phil gave another resoundingly loud belch and then shouted Eureka! and no that wasn't a reflection on anybodies personal hygiene. Yes, Phil shouted, Loafer has it in one, we should fire up the Punt and head for Lemonchello land, we do in fact have our own resident specialist and I for one have been getting cabin fever (not withstanding run ins with Crocs) We could have a little jolly and then come back to see how my seed sowing has panned out (dunno wot Patty was mithering about, It's only a few seeds)
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Post by JohnV on Mar 23, 2017 6:54:28 GMT
"Oh Gawd" thought John "They've no appreciation of how long it took me to beat all the dents out of the sides from the last expedition and I've only just finished painting the Mighty Lister and the paint's still wet" He hunched down a bit deeper into his armchair and took a calming draft of Gruntfuttocks. An odd feature in the corner of the bar caught his eye "Funny" he thought "that looks like a red and green aspidistra growing out of the skirting" he took another slurp (purely for medicinal purposes of course) "I thought they were normally in pots on gurt big stands"
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Post by peterboat on Mar 23, 2017 8:56:20 GMT
Peter hit the button and patty and troops arrived back at the punt. The look patty gave him wad enough to freeze antifreeze until she caught sight of the largest barrel of merlot she had ever seen! Peter checked cctv and all were present so he hit the big red button and they were gone. ......m
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Post by patty on Mar 23, 2017 16:05:55 GMT
It'd been such a long time since all the troops had sought out exploration....just like the old days...Time soon to fill her handbag with whatever woz out there....bit of this n that always came in handy...all the regulars sat with their fav drinks waiting for the mighty punt to get wherever it was going.....
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Post by JohnV on Mar 24, 2017 9:20:57 GMT
John meanwhile, was struggling. Never the brightest and definitely deficient in IT skills, he was attempting to overlay maritime charts over Google Earth images. Whatever he tried, the little arrow saying "you are here" shot to somewhere in the South Atlantic, a couple of hundred miles off the coast of West Africa. This was deffo not where John wished to travel to and unless he fixed the problem before some bright spark pressed the "Go" button they were going to be in deep deep doodoo.................................. ........... ........................................................ "whoops" said John ruefully as he glanced out of the scuttle
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Post by phil70 on Mar 24, 2017 17:43:33 GMT
Whoops indeed, Phil heard the slapping of water together with a slight jolt which indicated the Punt had landed. Phil with his usual zeal, seized the centerline and stepped off, SPLASH, SPLOOSH, the sound of a body landing in the water could be heard, frantic screaming followed as Phil floundered around in the water "some daft bugger has moved the bank." Assisted by a sniggering Loafer Phil regained the deck and promptly launched himself off the other side of the Punt only to endure a repeat performance in the water again. Once more Loafer hauled the very bedraggled and extremely wet Phil aboard . Phil stood in an ever growing puddle, scratching his head, with a pained, puzzled expression " Tell me this Loafer, where the hell is the land?" Futile asking Loafer because he was just as clueless as Flappy
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Post by patty on Mar 24, 2017 19:01:47 GMT
'Water water all around and ne'er a drop to drink"...just as well thought Patty pouring herself yet more Merlot.... 'Ere Peter, John'...where are we? she queried?... over the horizon a strange looking craft sailed...'ooh look' she says ..'r they flying the skull and crossbones?'
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Post by peterboat on Mar 24, 2017 20:18:23 GMT
Peter was struggling with where they were! He knew that it wasn't supposed to be here but quite where here was he was clueless. Taff's expression was guilty to say the least but he couldn't have changed the settings could he?
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Post by JohnV on Mar 24, 2017 21:15:31 GMT
A disconsolate John was hunched miserably over his flagon of Gruntfuttocks, desperately trying to look innocent. He was completely at a loss as to what he could do to correct the situation. The navigation program was ok that was on disc but the charts were on t'internet and there was no wifi in the South Atlantic. He sighed and sipped his ale and wondered who the hell it was that pushed the bloody button, "They've got no bloody consideration for the maintenance man" he grumbled "Another Gruntfuttocks please Bar Person Thingy" Like Inspector Morse he was a firm believer that ale assisted mental processes
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Post by loafer on Mar 24, 2017 21:20:15 GMT
There was a groan from the bottom of the punt.
'Are we there yet?' groaned Loafer.
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Post by patty on Mar 25, 2017 6:42:04 GMT
Well thought Patty...this lot couldn't navigate their way out of a paper bag, suppose they could wait for night and look at the stars with a sextant whatitscalled thingymajiggy object..though how one of them knew where you were when she didn't know..but in the meantime,.she watched as the err boat thingy on the horizon came closer...wonder if they r friendly she thought or just maybe she ought to fire up the mighty punt gun...just in case...and so she carefully took the measures required to ensure she remained 'in charge'......
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