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Post by Deleted on Mar 20, 2018 8:56:18 GMT
Last one I got went something like this...
Me - Hello
Lying scumbag - speel about computer has been infected and they were calling from my broadband provider to fix it.
Me - Ok then you will be able to confirm who my broadband provider is then.
Lying scumbag - Yes of course it's BT.
Me - wrong.
Me - Ok then if you are calling from my Broadband provider you will know my my name.
Lying scumbag - (Pause) er yes, John Smith. (yes he did actually say that)
Me - F**k off you lying theiving prick.
Hangs up.
I suppose it is possible they will at some point land on a BT BB customer called 'John Smith' who will falls for it but hells teeth.
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Post by phil70 on Mar 20, 2018 9:00:42 GMT
I find answering like this: "Battersea Dogs' Home, How may I help you?" confuses people. I have had to apologise sometimes, when it's been my boss. I have never understood this, my mrs does it, i answer every call, if i dont want to buy or trust them i simply hang up... My sis in law won't answer if she doesn't know the number or if it's withheld and so has missed several calls from her doctor and the hospital We answer any call and if we don't want whoever it is we just say "Bye"and put the phone down. My sis in law has no answer to the question "what can happen if you answer the phone But I suppose she is just one of those paranoid people,She sticks paper over her lappy webcam, she wants to have a new TV to replace the mahoosive heavy one she has but won't because the old one is too heavy for someone to steal......and so her life stumbles on Phil
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Post by Deleted on Mar 20, 2018 9:02:36 GMT
Nappy webacam....
dont go there froggy, dont go there...
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Post by phil70 on Mar 20, 2018 10:12:39 GMT
Actually my sis in law is a serious technophobe who proudly declares that she gives nobody her mobile number and in the next breath moans that no-one ever calls her on it. We try to call her but it rings out to voicemail because she puts her phone in the boot of her car because "you mustn't use a mobile while driving " and she often forgets to take it out of the boot. We have to text her to say she has an e-mail because she won't turn her lappy on in case someone is watching her on the webcam (despite the paper) And there is no point using the mail account on her phone because it is permanently turned of in case she gets a spam e-mail Phil
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Post by Deleted on Mar 20, 2018 10:13:14 GMT
Ring random phone number
Hello?
Yes Hello is Mr Wall there?
No
Is Mrs Wall there ?
No.
Are there any Walls there ?
No.
How do you keep the bloody roof up then ?
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Post by bargemast on Mar 20, 2018 10:41:20 GMT
I've never had a land line myself. First mobile I had was 1994 when I moved onto a boat and I've only ever had mobile phones since then. If I don't recognise the number I just don't answer it. Get very little trouble that way Well now that I know that, I won't try to call you then. Because you don't know my number, you won't pick up the phone, and likely avoid at least some trouble like that Peter.
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Post by NigelMoore on Mar 20, 2018 11:58:52 GMT
To present by way of balance, the other side of the coin – where the customer calls the provider and uses almost incomprehensible local vocabulary :
I appreciate that many Poms will find the Aussie terms as obscure as does the Indian operator in the skit.
The following video, however, explains/records one scam in some detail – same scenario as MJG describes.
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Post by TonyDunkley on Mar 20, 2018 14:13:10 GMT
To present by way of balance, the other side of the coin – where the customer calls the provider and uses almost incomprehensible local vocabulary : I appreciate that many Poms will find the Aussie terms as obscure as does the Indian operator in the skit. The following video, however, explains/records one scam in some detail – same scenario as MJG describes. The conversation in that audio clip is more than a little reminiscent of the one I had yesterday with C&RT's licensing department. I called them to renew a PBC on someone else's behalf only to be regaled with a semi-coherent account of their ongoing scam of passing off mandatory registration certificates as mandatory 'licences'. Apparently, the Trust doesn't 'do' registration certificates for boats based on and using their river waterways and navigations, but in their place are generously offering a 40% discount to 'rivers only' boaters on the standard boat licence fee.
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Post by kris on Mar 20, 2018 14:21:43 GMT
To present by way of balance, the other side of the coin – where the customer calls the provider and uses almost incomprehensible local vocabulary : I appreciate that many Poms will find the Aussie terms as obscure as does the Indian operator in the skit. The following video, however, explains/records one scam in some detail – same scenario as MJG describes. The conversation in that audio clip is more than a little reminiscent of the one I had yesterday with C&RT's licensing department. I called them to renew a PBC on someone else's behalf only to be regaled with a semi-coherent account of their ongoing scam of passing off mandatory registration certificates as mandatory 'licences'. Apparently, the Trust doesn't 'do' registration certificates for boats based on and using their river waterways and navigations, but in their place are generously offering a 40% discount to 'rivers only' boaters on the standard boat licence fee. yes they keep pushing this line, do you think it's because of the T&C's that they introduced to the liscence?
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Post by Deleted on Mar 20, 2018 14:44:52 GMT
I've never had a land line myself. First mobile I had was 1994 when I moved onto a boat and I've only ever had mobile phones since then. If I don't recognise the number I just don't answer it. Get very little trouble that way Well now that I know that, I won't try to call you then. Because you don't know my number, you won't pick up the phone, and likely avoid at least some trouble like that Peter. I've got your number from my MI5 contacts. I don't think you've got mine though have you ?
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Post by patty on Mar 20, 2018 17:40:15 GMT
Actually my sis in law is a serious technophobe who proudly declares that she gives nobody her mobile number and in the next breath moans that no-one ever calls her on it. We try to call her but it rings out to voicemail because she puts her phone in the boot of her car because "you mustn't use a mobile while driving " and she often forgets to take it out of the boot. We have to text her to say she has an e-mail because she won't turn her lappy on in case someone is watching her on the webcam (despite the paper) And there is no point using the mail account on her phone because it is permanently turned of in case she gets a spam e-mail Phil She sounds a very frightened woman...its sad that IT scares her that much..Isn't there anyone who can reassure her? Im not scared of it ..I'm quite disinterested...very rarely answer if I don't know number but I did this am and had a meaningful conversation with TRainline who tried to tell me 'glitches' their system my fault.....hmmph...I kept solely to the facts...actually one sentence that I repeated more than a few times(I can be a bit repetitive) ..result ..a refund of prolonged phone conversation....I thanked them ....
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Post by phil70 on Mar 21, 2018 10:17:11 GMT
Actually my sis in law is a serious technophobe who proudly declares that she gives nobody her mobile number and in the next breath moans that no-one ever calls her on it. We try to call her but it rings out to voicemail because she puts her phone in the boot of her car because "you mustn't use a mobile while driving " and she often forgets to take it out of the boot. We have to text her to say she has an e-mail because she won't turn her lappy on in case someone is watching her on the webcam (despite the paper) And there is no point using the mail account on her phone because it is permanently turned of in case she gets a spam e-mail Phil She sounds a very frightened woman...its sad that IT scares her that much..Isn't there anyone who can reassure her? Im not scared of it ..I'm quite disinterested...very rarely answer if I don't know number but I did this am and had a meaningful conversation with TRainline who tried to tell me 'glitches' their system my fault.....hmmph...I kept solely to the facts...actually one sentence that I repeated more than a few times(I can be a bit repetitive) ..result ..a refund of prolonged phone conversation....I thanked them .... Patty you are right, she spends her life being scared of things like she had her perfectly good double glazing replaced because she was told the new stuff is harder to break into. Years ago she had a detached retina, easily fixed today but now she is convinced she might go blind at any moment and so won't buy a new car but puts up with the expense and inconvenience of keeping what is now an old banger(She had it from new 20 years ago) She has a constant battle with her doctor because she thinks her BP is high despite the Doctors constant testing and reassurance that it is OK. Drives Chris mad as she seems to be wishing for an ailment while Chris just wishes she didn't have quite so many (DVT is the latest the clot is dissolving as we speak) Phil
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Post by bargemast on Mar 21, 2018 10:17:28 GMT
Well now that I know that, I won't try to call you then. Because you don't know my number, you won't pick up the phone, and likely avoid at least some trouble like that Peter. I've got your number from my MI5 contacts. I don't think you've got mine though have you ? I sadly can't answer this question as I'm trying to live within what the law allows me to do. Giving you this answer would mean that I'm obliged to kill you, which would be a loss for TB. So it's only because I don't want to deprive TB of your postings that I won't answer, and hope that you're happy with that . Peter.
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Post by patty on Mar 21, 2018 16:13:49 GMT
She sounds a very frightened woman...its sad that IT scares her that much..Isn't there anyone who can reassure her? Im not scared of it ..I'm quite disinterested...very rarely answer if I don't know number but I did this am and had a meaningful conversation with TRainline who tried to tell me 'glitches' their system my fault.....hmmph...I kept solely to the facts...actually one sentence that I repeated more than a few times(I can be a bit repetitive) ..result ..a refund of prolonged phone conversation....I thanked them .... Patty you are right, she spends her life being scared of things like she had her perfectly good double glazing replaced because she was told the new stuff is harder to break into. Years ago she had a detached retina, easily fixed today but now she is convinced she might go blind at any moment and so won't buy a new car but puts up with the expense and inconvenience of keeping what is now an old banger(She had it from new 20 years ago) She has a constant battle with her doctor because she thinks her BP is high despite the Doctors constant testing and reassurance that it is OK. Drives Chris mad as she seems to be wishing for an ailment while Chris just wishes she didn't have quite so many (DVT is the latest the clot is dissolving as we speak) Phil Sorry to hear about the DVT on top of everything else... Your sister in law probably needs counselling..people like that can drag you down so take care.. I used to be frightened of everything..fear ruled my life but Ive had some wonderful people help me...not all NHS approved...and the continuous fear resulted in ulcerated oesophagus/stomach and assorted other ills. I rarely go GP now...fortunately the ongoing health issues resolved with detaching from stress as much as I did...it can be a solitary life but for me tis better. Its quite funny now when I see GP as I always explain everything Ive tried which haven't worked. I will find the right place to live...next time looking with my head not my heart in gear....I must be sensible(maybe)
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Post by Andyberg on Apr 4, 2018 16:49:24 GMT
Haha...So long suckers!
Just waiting for my massive National Lottery win to be deposited, after getting e-mail confirmation & returning all the required info this morning, Im outta here!🙄
**********************************************************************
HAPPY HOME LOTTO INTERNATIONAL NATIONAL FREE LOTTERY CODE NL/UK 0001 UNITED KINGDOM REF: IPL/4249859609/WP1 BATCH: GL/91663/A AWARD FINAL NOTIFICATION
We happily announce to you the draw of the Happy Home Lottery International programs held on the April 1st 2018 in West Midlands, England. Your e-mail address ****************** attached to ticket number: 3-88-606 with Serial number EU/B-UK 04/02018-UHI drew the lucky numbers: 0328904411,which subsequently won you the lottery in the category (A). You are therefore been approved the total sum of One million British Pound in cash credited to file No.21300/18. This is from a total cash prize of Ten Million British Pounds, shared among the first Ten (10) lucky winners in this category (A). Please note that your lucky winning number falls within our European booklet representative office in Europe as indicated in your play coupon. In view of this, your One million British Pound would be released to you by our consultant firm in HAPPY HOME. Our consultant will immediately commence the process to facilitate the release of your winning as soon as you contact them. For security reasons, you are advised to keep your winning information confidential till your claims is processed and your fund remitted to you in whatever manner you deem fit to claim your prize. This is part of our precautionary measure to avoid double claiming and unwarranted abuse of this program by some unscrupulous elements.Please be warned. For you to collect your prizes, kindly fill the request details below and send it to our department Agent, confirming the receipt of this notification. HAPPY HOME AGENT Administrative Staff Tel : +44-703-184-3964 , +44-704-207-6988 Email : fmsb.agent@gmail.com VERIFICATION FORM FULL NAME: AGE: SEX: NATIONALITY: FULL ADDRESS: EMAIL ADRRESS: COUNTRY OF RESIDENCE: PHONE AND FAX NUMBER: MOBILE NUMBER OCCUPATION/POSITION: COMPANY: TICKET NUMBER: SERIAL NUMBER: NAME OF NEXT OF KIN ADDRESS OF NEXT OF KIN INFORMATION (Decree Law No. 196/03)
We guarantee the respect in the processing of personal data, under art. 13 D. Legislative Decree 196/03. The above information shall be forwarded to our paying Office for verification and immedaite release of your fund to you . Congratulations once more, and keep trust in us.. Promotions Coordinator. Online coordinator for BRITISH NATIONAL LOTTERY Sweepstakes International Program @2018 NOTE N.B. Any breach of confidentiality on the part of the winners will result in disqualification and any winner below the age of 18 years is automatically disqualified. Please do not reply to this mail. Contact your Claims agent immediately.
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