Deleted
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Joke Time
Dec 31, 2019 9:50:53 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2019 9:50:53 GMT
Technically it's "chacun à son goût" with a circumflex and a grave but I see what you did there
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Post by Jim on Dec 31, 2019 9:51:03 GMT
Do the one about the hermit called Dave. I'll leave that one for you to take the credit.
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Post by Jim on Dec 31, 2019 9:52:04 GMT
Technically it's "goût" with a circumflex but I see what you did there Couldn't be bothered searching for the jewish alphabet.
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Joke Time
Dec 31, 2019 9:54:29 GMT
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Jim likes this
Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2019 9:54:29 GMT
There once was a hermit named Dave Who decided to dig his own grave He was at it all day At least that's what they say And fell into an underground cave.
There once was an old boy called Fred Who liked to pretend he was dead He lay in the dark In the middle of the park And someone tripped over his head !
(I made those up just now).
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Post by Jim on Dec 31, 2019 9:56:57 GMT
There once was a hermit named Dave Who decided to dig his own grave He was at it all day At least that's what they say And fell into an underground cave. A bit clunky at the end. 7/10
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Dec 31, 2019 9:58:31 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2019 9:58:31 GMT
There once was a hermit named Dave Who decided to dig his own grave He was at it all day At least that's what they say And fell into an underground cave. A bit clunky at the end. 7/10 It could have been smoother I agree.
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Post by Jim on Dec 31, 2019 9:59:54 GMT
There once was a hermit named Dave Who decided to dig his own grave He was at it all day At least that's what they say And fell into an underground cave. There once was an old boy called Fred Who liked to pretend he was dead He lay in the dark In the middle of the park And someone tripped over his head ! (I made those up just now). We can tell.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2019 12:06:42 GMT
There once was a hermit named Dave Who decided to dig his own grave He was at it all day At least that's what they say And fell into an underground cave. There once was an old boy called Fred Who liked to pretend he was dead He lay in the dark In the middle of the park And someone tripped over his head ! (I made those up just now). We can tell. There once was a joker named Jim With a joke box filled up to the brim He thought they were good When really they should Have all been just thrown in the bin.
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Post by Jim on Dec 31, 2019 12:44:27 GMT
There once was a joker named Jim With a joke box filled up to the brim He thought they were good When really they should Have all been just thrown in the bin. 4/10. Jim was a joker, the boss Whose joke book was stolen by Ross He had a good tactic To raid foxy's attic And thereby redeem his loss.
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Post by JohnV on Dec 31, 2019 13:50:21 GMT
A wily young rascal called Ross at tactics n'ere at a loss he redacted the good bits and just left the edits an appalling load of old dross
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Post by lollygagger on Jan 6, 2020 7:56:05 GMT
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Post by Mr Stabby on Jan 8, 2020 0:46:05 GMT
The Liverpool manager flies to Baghdad to watch a young Iraqi play
football and is suitably impressed and arranges him to come over to
Anfield.
Two weeks later Liverpool are 4-0 down to Man Utd with only 20
minutes left. The manager gives the young Iraqi striker the nod and on he
goes.
The lad is a sensation, scores 5 goals in 20 minutes and wins the game
for Liverpool.
The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the
media love the new star.
When the player comes off the pitch he phones his mum to tell her
about his first day in English football.
"Hello mum, guess what?" he says . "I played for 20
minutes today, we were 4-0 down but I scored 5 and we won. Everybody
loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me."
"Wonderful," says his mum, "Let me tell you about my day. Your father
got shot in the street and robbed, your sister and I were ambushed, gang
raped and beaten and your brother has joined a gang of looters, and all
while you were having such great time."
The young lad is very upset, "What can I say mum, but I'm so sorry."
"Sorry?!!! Sorry?!!!" says his mum, "It's your bloody fault we moved
to Liverpool!"
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Post by Mr Stabby on Jan 14, 2020 17:55:46 GMT
So I went on the tour of Cheddar Gorge. The guide said that she would shortly be showing us some stalactites but asked us not to crack one off.
She wasn't even that attractive.
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Deleted
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Jan 14, 2020 18:08:27 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jan 14, 2020 18:08:27 GMT
That's rather coarse !
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Post by Mr Stabby on Jan 14, 2020 18:21:51 GMT
I did anyway.
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