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Post by JohnV on Feb 12, 2020 10:37:08 GMT
John had heard where there was a 8L3B going for a sensible deposit and started to lay his plans
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Post by peterboat on Feb 12, 2020 16:26:42 GMT
Johns ears Pricked up when he heard the sound of a big gardener diesel purring, he looked at the engine room and saw Peter grinning at him as he changed the engine note to a V12 merlin
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Post by JohnV on Feb 12, 2020 16:47:39 GMT
John stormed out "It's not the same thing" he shouted over his shoulder as he marched down the deck
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Post by phil70 on Feb 12, 2020 20:47:19 GMT
Flappy thought quite right, a Merlin doesn't run on Derv and that would create all kinds of problems with the BSS Flappy dismissed the engine from his mind and decided to concentrate on preparations for Friday Flappy had snuck out on Mrs Flappy and was busy with loads of pink and red paper and a pair of scissors Flappy lovingly crafted pink and red Roses and had already filled a large cardboard box with paper rose petals. Flappy worked solidly with just the occasional flagon of Gruntfuttocks, just to stave of dehydration you understand Flappys next task was to transform the unStable Bar into a repository of all things romantic, he had a load of joss stick holders that he dotted around and gave the Coate Faerie instructions to light them on FRIDAY THE 14TH. Flappy was turning out a load of red crepe swages which he fixed around the unStable Bar so it resembled some sort of alien growth. Finally Flappy went round with a humongous box of red candles which he adorned the tables, the bar, the window ledges in fact any vacant flat surface . Standing back to admire his handy work Flappy felt that there was one thing missing ...... a centre piece, but what to use? Suddenly Flappy had a epiphany moment and thought ....... red dodecahedron !!!!!
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Post by peterboat on Feb 13, 2020 14:28:08 GMT
Secretly John was curious how the drive worked and sneaked down the engine hole to look at it, it had writing on it, confirming his suspicions where Peter had acquired it from, and sure enough the date 1000 years into the future on the box, told him all he needed to know. The sign also said it was made for Narrowboats to provide perpetual motion and electrical generation for ever! Johns eyes glazed over with the thought of making and selling them "Grutfuttocks forever" he murmured, the only problem was how did you open the boxes, he got out one of Flappys purloined hammers and gave it a little tap on the lid, their was a huge flash and the hammer was vaporised!! and the hum the drive box made increased. Mrs BB stuck her head down the engine hole and yelled at John "stop whatever you are doing you muppet you are dragging the bar into the canal" Flappy appeared at the bar door shouting about someone spoiling his decorating. The hum stopped and the punt once again stopped moving, the only problem was the decking that previously was on land was now a pontoon and the only way into the bar was through the back door, as the coate fairy had discoved when he stepped out of the front door................into the canal!!
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Post by JohnV on Feb 13, 2020 14:39:44 GMT
Peter, laughing at the consternation among the bar's occupants, stepped through the office door. Instead of the office he found himself handcuffed and stood before a large robot, cowering in a cage in the corner was Taff. Peter noticed the inscription on the robot and paled, it said Time Police Enforcement Robot grade Two
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Post by peterboat on Feb 14, 2020 0:16:08 GMT
He then pressed the button on wrist gizmo and Taff and he disappeared, he knew he would be followed so chose the magnet planet he had been to before, sure enough the robot appeared and was immediately pinned to the ground with all the others that had followed him in the past! Peter removed the robots chip and smashed it, he then took out its power pack as they were ever so useful, last was the weapons which he blew the robots head to pieces with,"I think its Capri for us Taff" Peter said and ported to Cuba because he knew the robot could still hear........................
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Post by phil70 on Feb 14, 2020 8:04:54 GMT
Flappy stood huffing and puffing, all the while muttering under his breath " Huh,put in all this effort to make today a special day and look what's happened ...... John has ruined my bestest hammer, the punt has been ruined... again, Peter has absconded .... again, the unStable Bar so tastefully decorated ruined .... again , makes me mad .... again" Flappy stood and took stock of the situation, what is needed was a moment of normality, we need Patty back that's for sure, we need Mrs BB to be in cahoots with the girls (snigger) and we need Taff to take control of his human and stop Peter from zapping off all over the place. With a sigh Flappy retrieve his trusty tandem tricycle, hitched a rope to it, selected the lowest gear and slowly but surely towed the unStable Bar back to its cut side location. Once this one done Flappy set about the Thunder Punt and with a heavy heart he began to beat the bejabbers out of it, crafting its battered shell back to its once fabulous self. Flappy called out for help to John, Metal Lady and Mrs BB, it was a case of " all hands on deck"
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Post by Trina on Feb 14, 2020 15:26:13 GMT
Mrs BB slowly lifted her head out of her favourite drinking bucket."Did I hear someone call my name or am I hearing things as well as seeing things?" *Like the pinkπ heffalumps she'd spotted yesterday. Mrs BB decided it was time to do something as she'd nearly finished the job lot of Rusty Rats Tail Patty had left her-to 'tide her over' while she was away on her holibobs.She wasn't sure what she needed to do,but was certain someone would come along to give her a clue sooner rather than later... Meanwhile,Mrs BB was searching for an eco-friendly straw to get the last dregs out of the corners of her bucket.*I know buckets don't usually have corners but I'm sure you get the idea,!
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Post by metanoia on Mar 3, 2020 20:23:14 GMT
"Hey, BB, we need a plan!" came the distant echoing clang. "Would have been here sooner but these winds keep my clanking bits ringing in all sorts of strange ways you just DON'T want to know.
If I can help in the meantime with your bucket while we try to sort this out I have this cool little red straw thingy (very NON eco, sorry!) on my Wd40 can that will reach into places that...β¦."
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Post by metanoia on Mar 22, 2020 19:41:36 GMT
Assume we're closed down now β¦.
.... but please spare a thought for the Coate Faerie, the gravy stained cat and the occasional table if you're passing - pretty sure they must all fall into the "at risk" category.
Keep safe and well
Clang x
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Post by patty on Mar 22, 2020 19:51:28 GMT
Patty wandered into the empty bar, the shutters creaked as the ill wind blew a wholey. All the way round S America she'd collected all sorts of treasures to show her bestest buddies and now this social isolation meant the gurls couldn't have a good ole get together. She sighed and wandered over to the bar, there with a bright red ribbon adorning the neck stood a litre sized bottle of finest Merlot.......
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Post by metanoia on Mar 22, 2020 19:56:10 GMT
β¦ with a message saying "Welcome Home"
.... but poor Patty wasn't even allowed to administer Granny Glad's Cure-All to any unsuspecting passerbyβ¦. never mind reveal the contents of that handbag - for now!
sigh, clang, clunk x
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Post by Trina on Mar 22, 2020 21:06:14 GMT
Sadly,Mrs BB was still asleep under a table.What on earth was going to happen to her when she eventually woke up ??
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Post by JohnV on Mar 23, 2020 5:45:57 GMT
A strange figure, wrapped in folds of bubble wrap worn over a strange canvas jacket, thigh waders, wearing an ex WD gas mask and carrying an empty 20 litre container that still smelled of red, shuffled into the bar and eased it's way to the cask of Gruntfuttocks.
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