The Arse-Wiping Technique Thread

Fire extinguisher filled with water and coal ash pumped up to 85psi then released in a dispersed pattern works.

Hope you don't flush the kitchen towel.

It’s a good question. My formative years were spent in accordance with the great British tradition of smearing the brown stuff around with paper, until it is sufficiently thin to not be that noticeable. Then I went to live in the Far East for a year. I discovered that nearly everywhere else in the world they find the concept of the paper smear thing rather disgusting, and instead each toilet has a hose with “jet wash” trigger gun, that you scoosh your bottom out with. Well either that or just a bucket of water that you can scoop appropriately. But anyway the main point is no disgusting smearing of shit on paper,

So now at home I always sit on the edge of the bath and use the shower. Similar on the boat. No shit smearing here!