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Post by JohnV on Sept 2, 2021 21:53:45 GMT
"anyway" said Flappy to John, who by now had somewhat overcome his shock of being plunged into the canal at high velocity and was beginning to get a buzz from the contents of the hip flask "why were you splashing around in the water so long"? John sighed "It was Patty's fault, she threw me one end of the rope ..... but didn't tie off the other end, I was pulling and pulling and nothing was happening except I was getting tangled up in yards of rope"
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Post by phil70 on Sept 10, 2021 21:39:51 GMT
It's a pity you weren't blessed with foresight, maybe you should consider a fortune teller said Flappy. John gave this thought some very grave consideration then turned to Flappy and said "I don't have a scoobie where to begin) Flappy suggested giving Peters new dog a try. As it happens Oscar actually runs" Oscars Orrors" a personal horoscope that occasionally warned of Horrors but generally just provided a decent Horoscope. John looked up brightly and enquired about the cost, "Free, nada, zilch" Oscar only does it as a hobby so put your wallet away. The gruesome twosome march off to the unstable Bar for light refreshments. Flappy sat with a foaming flagon of Gruntfuttockd and idly flicked Dreamies for Barney to snaffle
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Post by JohnV on Sept 11, 2021 2:16:52 GMT
The gravy stained cat lurked quietly behind the potted aspidestra watching Phil feed his Dreamies to that monster of an intruder. In it's mind's eye it visualised various cattystrophes befalling Phil for his infidelity and Barney for ............. just being a big, very big bruiser of an uninvited and unwelcome intruder
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Post by phil70 on Sept 15, 2021 21:05:42 GMT
The Gravy Stained Cat had a light bulb ๐ก moment and cunningly opened a porthole and thought Karma comes around and laid a trail of Dreamies to the porthole and as Barney snaffled his way to the said orifice and as Barney tucked into the last one his Eagle eye spotted a rogue Dreamies pinging out of porthole and leapt for it!! The Gravy Stained Cat smirked and sniggered out loud while waiting for the splash, it didn't have to wait long before a loud splash was heard followed by a very disgruntled howl from Barney. All the crew were amazed to see the Gravy Stained Cat running around the bar fist pumping and yelling YES YES YES RESULT it then wandered off to regain its rightful seat perched on Flappy's head. John looked up at Flappy and muttered something about Status Quo being restored. Flappy muttered too but was less than complimentary about his lodger being back. Barney came dripping into the bar while looking daggers at the smug. Cat had yoou been able to speak cat you would have heard a familiar phrase directed at the Gravy Stained Cat " I'll be back"
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Post by Trina on Sept 15, 2021 21:34:42 GMT
Barney was going to get revenge... He sharpened his claws & teeth,then sat and bided his time.The gravy stained cat would pay & Barney was already planning how.๐คจ
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Post by phil70 on Sept 15, 2021 22:42:45 GMT
Flappy was getting rather anxious at the state of the cat wars for no other reason than he had one of the combatents living on his head, that in it's self was reason enough for Flappy to be worried. John had been working on a plan to broker a peace deal but thirst was getting in the way so John called the bar thingy and ordered a couple of flagon of Gruntfuttocks finest (on Flappy's slate.... of course) The gruesome twosome had some serious planning to do and needed something to loosen up the thinking process
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Post by phil70 on Sept 27, 2021 21:15:49 GMT
Several flagon later the boys? were still no nearer a solution to the Cat Wars but hark said Flappy, he and John strained their ears and then caught a muffled roar. Grinning widely at each other the gruesome twosome spoke in unison.... FREYA!! so all they had to do was persuade Patty to loan them the white wolf for a while and with a bit of luck the Gravy Stained Cat and Barney would be cowed into a sort of peace. Just to make sure Flappy secured a generous supply of Dreamies
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Post by JohnV on Sept 28, 2021 7:55:44 GMT
John's thinking was a little more confuddled than normal (possibly due to the intake of many flagons of Gruntfuttocks Finest) but although Flappy's arguments were very persuasive he couldn't help thinking that they might be missing something important. He scratched himself (not one of his most redeeming activities) and then sipped his ale.
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Post by patty on Sept 28, 2021 12:53:00 GMT
meanwhile Patty had decided that Freya's training would involve forging a unified team with the Gravy Stained Cat, Barney and Oscar...together they would be invincible and strike terror in the hearts of any who dared to come up against them.....
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Post by phil70 on Sept 29, 2021 22:06:02 GMT
Flappy slapped John on the back and chortled " I'm liking this already" With Patty doing the training what could possibly go wrong
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Post by JohnV on Oct 2, 2021 11:25:05 GMT
John noticed that someone had removed the picture of Trump from the centre of the dartboard and replaced it with a picture of Greta
"suppose that will do " he muttered to himself
(He had been going to replace it with one of Macron but had been beaten to it.)
He picked up an "arrer" and hurled it at the board. It stuck quivering in the wall about 6 mm away from the spot light "bugger" he said.
It earned him a dirty look from the bar person thingy (but he was unsure if it was for the hole in the wall or the swearing)
John was in a funny mood, he was growing more and more unsettled and following the arrival of Freya followed by her very long absences and the simultaneous disappearances of the Gravy Stained Cat and Barney the Battering Bruiser had become more and more convinced a dangerous situation was building up ...... and he couldn't work out what the hell it was
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Post by metanoia on Oct 3, 2021 19:23:41 GMT
"Clang! Clang! Clanging 'ell ...where's a decent hammer when you need one? Flappy... have you been sneaking around my toolbox YET again? Seventeen skylookers holding their ropes at the last lock - I worked them all up and .... that left just me and G ...... seems there's a really serious need to harness those pets but most importantly that punt to get us out of here ........
"Anyway" (as we say around these parts!) - rumour has it there is a MEGA Big Red lurking this year as there are no H(eavy) G(reat) (Va)cuous drivers to help out again this year....
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Post by Trina on Oct 3, 2021 19:48:07 GMT
Mega Big Red...๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ
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Post by patty on Oct 4, 2021 7:34:14 GMT
Patty realised with the threat of a super duper Big Red offensive cranking up that getting the canine/feline team trained into an ace fighting/spying unit now imperative..... With her bag brimming with assorted treats she set up a training school in the bar, She instructed The Bar Thingy to ensure continuous refills of Merlot(charged to Flappys tab)......
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Post by JohnV on Oct 4, 2021 21:07:08 GMT
John was singing away as he strode out down the track towards the hiding place of the punt "Follow me lads, this 'aint no lager ale, One pint down you'll be swinging in the gale" he warbled away, the change in mood from the earlier few days was remarkable, he was getting so concerned about some unknown threat. That all changed when he heard the name "Big Red" Now he had a target all was well in Johns world ..... "..... she's called the dreadnought cider and she's proper and she's fine and when the day is over ...... " John stopped and checked around then parted the undergrowth and stepped through.
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