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Post by quaysider on Oct 20, 2016 21:03:49 GMT
I need to vent... Some of you may know, by this time next week our boat will FINALLY be floating on our mooring - having been craned in at some point during the day. For ME - (selfish I know) it's an important day after nearly 7 years of bloody hard savings and 'foregoing' many things we'd like to have been able to do...
Whilst I DO blog about it - it's actually 'private' in our "real lives"....with the exception of close family and a few friends...
Andy enjoys showing off to his sister... her husband (and father of his reasonably nice twin nephews) is however a complete and utter piss -head. In th 10 years years we've been together, I've not ONCE seen him WITHOUT a can of beer in his hand... whilst this is HIS/THEIR business - whenever they visit, he even COMES with a can in his hand!
This really gets under my skin... imho, the kids are at risk now they're entering their teens.... in that at some point they will react to their drunken father and potentially DO something that might feck up the rest of their lives....
OK - so I may be over thinking things, but I DO remember being young and full of hormones I couldn't control - having an alcoholic for a father isn't a good thing for them.
AND to cap it all, apparently his sister has invited herself (and kids and boozing husband) along to OUR craning in next week... I'm livid.
What can I do to stop this ... or rather to stop this attendance from spoiling what is a) a very stressful time for me and b) what SHOULD be a pleasurable end to many years of planning?
grrr... hmmmfff and arse!
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Post by dyertribe on Oct 20, 2016 21:17:29 GMT
What does Andy have to say on the subject?
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Post by quaysider on Oct 20, 2016 21:18:53 GMT
.... he's "tried"... he can't stand the bloke either but doesn't want to upset her... ffs...
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Post by Deleted on Oct 20, 2016 21:20:31 GMT
Send em to the wrong marina?
Joking aside, I lived next door to a knuckle dragging fuckwit that liked a beer and clouting his Mrs, I had one run I with him over noise that ended up with a minor scuffle on his drive. Not wanting to be seen as the aggressor I got in touch with Dibble, they were happy that I hadn't gone around to slap him and were well aware of him being a weapons grade cunt. Unfortunately, his Mrs was as dumb as a box of hammers and would never see the bastard fetched away by plod.
Last I heard their kid was In care.
We moved in the end.
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Post by dyertribe on Oct 20, 2016 21:21:44 GMT
Ok can Andy speak to his sister in a way that won't cause WW3 or a complete family rift? He can always blame you!
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Post by quaysider on Oct 20, 2016 21:24:35 GMT
lol - I wish... this has been bubbling under the surface for a few weeks now and NOTHING has been resolved... I've threatened to do it in a "once and for all" way but that WILL only lead to bridges being burned as I'm not the most diplomatic person - it's the "fire-engine-blonde" in me so I'm told!
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Post by Telemachus on Oct 20, 2016 21:30:00 GMT
Hmm tricky. Fortunately for me Jeff hates his brother in law enough for contact to be kept to a minimum (he's not and alcy, just a first grade twazzock.). We did have clear ground rules before we got our boat that we would never loan it to anyone including relatives, maybe you should at least do that now, before it arises although I suppose it's less relevant if you're going to be living on it.
Sometimes you have to make sacrifices for your loved ones (Jeff puts up with my sister from time to time!). Maybe grin and bear it this time. Sorry.
for the nephews, I think all you can do is let them know they have a bolthole if they ever need it.
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Post by Trina on Oct 20, 2016 21:32:15 GMT
Tell them that you both are so stressed by the craning in etc that you don't want anybody there at all.Explain that you'll invite them to look around the boat at a later date (like 2025 or thereabouts...).
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Post by JohnV on Oct 20, 2016 21:32:40 GMT
Hmmmm ! sensible moderating hat on I suspect when it actually comes to it you will be so damned wound up and busy you probably won't even notice whoever is there. You will be running round fretting that the lifting straps are too small, too close together, are damaging your paintwork, the crane is too small, the lift is too big a jib out, The crane driver is smoking a thunderbunt. If the crane overload bell goes you will have a heart attack. When the base plate touches the water you will be trying to leap on board to check there are no leaks, you will be screaming at the team not to take the strops off before you have checked absolutely every square millimetre of the hull for leaks, and even then you will be reluctant. You will then spend the next hour or so stroking your pride and joy the boat dammit . During this part of the day you will be totally unaware of anything else, you will then pour several fingers of cognac down your throat and collapse exhausted after telling everyone to piss off home. see sensible moderating
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Post by Telemachus on Oct 20, 2016 21:33:03 GMT
Whilst I DO blog about it - it's actually 'private' in our "real lives"....with the exception of close family and a few friends...
It's a sign of the times when having a fat boat built is more embarrassing than being a bender!
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Post by JohnV on Oct 20, 2016 21:41:31 GMT
Whilst I DO blog about it - it's actually 'private' in our "real lives"....with the exception of close family and a few friends...
It's a sign of the times when having a fat boat built is more embarrassing than being a bender! loody hilarious .............. That's my keyboard washed again today
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Post by geo on Oct 20, 2016 21:42:09 GMT
Agree with JohnV, but one thought that might help. Tell him and sister that visitors for safety reason are not allowed within a 100 feet of the crane or water's edge.
Only thing I can think of, sorry not more help
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Post by Deleted on Oct 20, 2016 21:46:16 GMT
I think it's a case of grin and bear it. Your treading very dangerous water. I know it's hard, but you just need to close your mind from it for the moment. By all means though, choose a time for you and your partner to address the overall issue, preferably when the guy is on his own.
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Post by geo on Oct 20, 2016 21:46:17 GMT
BTW Gazza think you will find the law has moved on a bit. They will arrest without the wife's evidence, charge and convict on the basis police evidence alone in domestic cases. They woke up to the wife is her own worst enemy bit.
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Post by dyertribe on Oct 20, 2016 22:11:08 GMT
Agree with JohnV, but one thought that might help. Tell him and sister that visitors for safety reason are not allowed within a 100 feet of the crane or water's edge. Only thing I can think of, sorry not more help I like this solution! say the boatyard only just told you. So sorry and all that.....
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