Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 22, 2017 16:29:06 GMT
100% agree with you D9. Funeral companies are parasites. Only funeral I've been to was that of my mother. As my two sisters insisted on a proper burial including buying a woodland plot (!) I was outnumbered. I would have gone for the cheapest option (as would my mum...) This dissolving method sounds interestinf but I imagine it is probably pretty expensive. I suspect that my Dad's sisters will be a pain in the arse like that when my dad dies. He has already warned them not to interfere and to go with whatever I do. When my mum died she ended up having a catholic funeral service and wake, despite her being an atheist, due to my fuckwit of a stepfather. She would have hated that if she'd known. The problem is that even if you define in your will what you want to happen there is no legal obligation to adhere to the instructions (unlike other aspects of the will regarding legacies) you set out. My thoughts are that it should be a legal requirement that if somebody has set down what they want to happen after their death it should be against the law to go against this. (the above is based on my understanding after having to deal with my Mother in laws funeral last week)
|
|
|
Post by Stumpy on May 22, 2017 16:38:18 GMT
I've told my kids that when I kick the bucket, they are specifically prohibited from putting wreathes of white flowers which say "DAD" in the windows of the hearse and if they ignore me I will come back and haunt them. At least its only 3 letters. MR STABBY would be much more expensive. Or Mr Snot Gobbler
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 22, 2017 16:50:54 GMT
Yes. His current name could be good for a giggle if the space was moved one letter to the right Sadly I don't think one is allowed to have a giggle at funerals, its not the "done thing".
|
|
|
Post by naughtyfox on May 22, 2017 17:56:59 GMT
At the funeral of one of my wife's sister's husbands, as part of the service a girl started playing a flute all wibbly-wobbly and my kids started sniggering and of course it was impossible to stop me from joining in.
So, it's only their funeral. It's much more important to visit people when they're alive. How many people turn up at funerals when they haven't bothered to call round for years?
When my wife died (a few years ago now) I arranged as much as I could, there didn't seem to be anything I could do to avoid having to using a funeral director's but I like to think I did it sensibly and thoughtfully, and looking back now I don't think I made any mistakes (apart from one - see below). Her body was taken to the church where she is buried in a vehicle (hearse) belonging to that funeral director, for instance - I couldn't really see myself and the pathologist at the morgue putting her on the back seats of our own car, can you? I did a bit of legwork and saved many costs I'm sure - better to save money for our two children than waste it on a mountain of flowers? The last stage was the 'submission of details of her estate', and I went to see a legal-aid lawyer about this. You get half an hour's free advice. Well, this utter tosspot and villain just wanted to advertise his services to me, waggling huge tomes of Finnish Law under my nose and telling me I'm too stupid to understand how it all goes. I said I thought the Tax Office themselves might be able to advise - and he got all blustery and told me in the strictest terms that it was 'not legal' for me as the husband to deal with this at the Tax Office. I should have watched him leave his office, discovered which car was his, and let the air out of the tyres the next day - that was my only mistake, I think, not doing that! Well, off I went to the Tax Office - not far away. Guess what? They had a booklet advising how to deal with this matter - and said to me to contact them if they could help further! Lawyers like that creep charge about £3000 for that service. Cost to me? Four cups of coffee and a couple of buns for a relation and a neighbour who came round to run through it all with me over a couple of hours and put their names down as witnesses.
|
|
|
Post by dyertribe on May 22, 2017 18:01:20 GMT
I suspect that my Dad's sisters will be a pain in the arse like that when my dad dies. He has already warned them not to interfere and to go with whatever I do. When my mum died she ended up having a catholic funeral service and wake, despite her being an atheist, due to my fuckwit of a stepfather. She would have hated that if she'd known. The problem is that even if you define in your will what you want to happen there is no legal obligation to adhere to the instructions (unlike other aspects of the will regarding legacies) you set out. My thoughts are that it should be a legal requirement that if somebody has set down what they want to happen after their death it should be against the law to go against this. (the above is based on my understanding after having to deal with my Mother in laws funeral last week) The thing is, in law you cannot own anything once you are dead.Therefore your executor "owns" your body and so has the say in what happens to it. As so many people don't even make wills, asking them to set down their funeral wishes is unlikely to work. A pre-paid funeral plan is one solution as you can sort out and pay for it all in your lifetime and then you have a greater chance of your wishes being carried out.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 22, 2017 18:35:32 GMT
My take on this.
Unless the deceased has stipulated what they want (a fairly selfish position in my opinion unless just given as a guideline) then the funeral/disposal of the body should be carried out in a way that gives the 'most of the living' the best chance of coming to accept the death.
|
|
|
Post by lollygagger on May 22, 2017 18:51:10 GMT
I don't think the details matter but I'm in favour of marking death somehow. I'm a funeral fan, it's at funerals and wakes you meet all the other fascets of the person's life and can be eye opening. Without some kind of formal happening nobody turns up and a never to be repeated opportunity is lost. I never miss one.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 22, 2017 18:51:15 GMT
My take on this. Unless the deceased has stipulated what they want (a fairly selfish position in my opinion unless just given as a guideline) then the funeral/disposal of the body should be carried out in a way that gives the 'most of the living' the best chance of coming to accept the death. I think thats sound. In my case there were me and my 2 sisters. My mum was single divorced 30 years before she died so my dad had no say (rightly). Democracy in action and the majority (2 sisters) got what they wanted and hopefully it served them well. To me it was a charade.
|
|
|
Post by Saltysplash on May 22, 2017 18:57:10 GMT
I've often thought about the best way to dispose of a bod. Not my own, the family can fight over that when i'm gone, but i'm thinking of those what if moments, like, what if someone broke in and you had to fight them off and in the melee you finished them off good and proper. My feeling is that previous victims have fallen foul of the Law because they made the mistake of calling the Police.
So chummy breaks in, nobody knows he was screwing your home, what do you do with the stiff with the poker through his head?
Its got to be dumped at sea, which was fine when I owned the old MFV, not so easy now with a fat canal boat.
Shallow graves always seem to be found by some nosey dog and once found there is always the danger that you have left some forensic clue attached.
oh the dilemma
|
|
|
Post by thebfg on May 22, 2017 19:05:11 GMT
I've often thought about the best way to dispose of a bod. Not my own, the family can fight over that when i'm gone, but i'm thinking of those what if moments, like, what if someone broke in and you had to fight them off and in the melee you finished them off good and proper. My feeling is that previous victims have fallen foul of the Law because they made the mistake of calling the Police. So chummy breaks in, nobody knows he was screwing your home, what do you do with the stiff with the poker through his head? Its got to be dumped at sea, which was fine when I owned the old MFV, not so easy now with a fat canal boat. Shallow graves always seem to be found by some nosey dog and once found there is always the danger that you have left some forensic clue attached. oh the dilemma Mr stabby has some ideas. Involving cutting up and tunnells.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 22, 2017 19:07:20 GMT
There are some deep bits on the non tidal Thames. I measured over 20ft with the sounder at Halliford Bends near Shepperton but that was about 10 years ago.
Bit of a trek but doable in a day given the right tides. Galvanised chain for longevity.
It didn't seem so deep last year when I passed so it may have already been used.
|
|
|
Post by Saltysplash on May 22, 2017 19:09:40 GMT
There are some deep bits on the non tidal Thames. I measured over 20ft with the sounder at Halliford Bends near Shepperton but that was about 10 years ago. Bit of a trek but doable in a day given the right tides. Galvanised chain for longevity. It didn't seem so deep last year when I passed so it may have already been used. Theres always the danger of dreging or some twit in a cruiser dragging his anchor.....or even some nerd dragging a Magnet
|
|
|
Post by Mr Stabby on May 22, 2017 19:11:57 GMT
I've often thought about the best way to dispose of a bod. Not my own, the family can fight over that when i'm gone, but i'm thinking of those what if moments, like, what if someone broke in and you had to fight them off and in the melee you finished them off good and proper. My feeling is that previous victims have fallen foul of the Law because they made the mistake of calling the Police. So chummy breaks in, nobody knows he was screwing your home, what do you do with the stiff with the poker through his head? Its got to be dumped at sea, which was fine when I owned the old MFV, not so easy now with a fat canal boat. Shallow graves always seem to be found by some nosey dog and once found there is always the danger that you have left some forensic clue attached. oh the dilemma I normally dismember them at some quiet spot at night on the front deck, which can be easily hosed down afterwards, and then dispose of the body parts in bin liners in CRT bins along with old oil filters, beer cans, potato peelings etc to conceal them. I'm not saying it's foolproof but they haven't got me yet. Top tip- if you do have to suddenly visit a supermarket to buy bin liners, kitchen knives, bleach etc, pay cash and don't use a loyalty card, they can trace you through those.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 22, 2017 19:17:42 GMT
Whats the bleach for?
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 22, 2017 19:22:48 GMT
I've often thought about the best way to dispose of a bod. Not my own, the family can fight over that when i'm gone, but i'm thinking of those what if moments, like, what if someone broke in and you had to fight them off and in the melee you finished them off good and proper. My feeling is that previous victims have fallen foul of the Law because they made the mistake of calling the Police. So chummy breaks in, nobody knows he was screwing your home, what do you do with the stiff with the poker through his head? Its got to be dumped at sea, which was fine when I owned the old MFV, not so easy now with a fat canal boat. Shallow graves always seem to be found by some nosey dog and once found there is always the danger that you have left some forensic clue attached. oh the dilemma I normally dismember them at some quiet spot at night on the front deck, which can be easily hosed down afterwards, and then dispose of the body parts in bin liners in CRT bins along with old oil filters, beer cans, potato peelings etc to conceal them. I'm not saying it's foolproof but they haven't got me yet. Top tip- if you do have to suddenly visit a supermarket to buy bin liners, kitchen knives, bleach etc, pay cash and don't use a loyalty card, they can trace you through those. They'll get you in the end Mrs Tabby, they always do.
|
|