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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2020 11:12:46 GMT
Well today is the last day of my abstinence. Whether I'll start drinking again tomorrow I've not decided. Good things - Saved around £30-40. Still alive but did take a small amount of aspirin twice as a precaution when I felt a bit heady. Didn't talk bollocks so much according to Chris (John might disagree). Portapotty lasted longer without needing emptying. Felt less apathetic. Even did a 9 mile walk. Didn't get the usual depressive feelings I usually get the day after drinking. Bad things - Not as much fun as having a drinking day. A bit boring being on a flat line. I also spent less time on TB. Not sure if that's a good thing or bad thing. With a list like that I wouldn't touch another drop. "Not so much fun"? I think you're deluding yourself there because you're an alcoholic in denial. I think you might want to check the definition of alcohilism. If people didn't enjoy drinking they wouldn't do it.
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Post by lollygagger on Jun 7, 2020 12:05:50 GMT
My definition would be someone who recogises that it causes him depression and lethargy but carries on regardless.
You've been banging on about what a big problem depression is and there you are self inflicting it.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2020 12:56:11 GMT
My definition would be someone who recogises that it causes him depression and lethargy but carries on regardless. You've been banging on about what a big problem depression is and there you are self inflicting it. The funny thing about depression (see what I did there) is that people who suffer from it may be able to logically analyse why they are depressed but actually behave in a way that makes the situation worse. Like drinking too much. Often, telling someone to pull their socks up is actually destructive, not helpful. However, and I'm sure our resident keep-fit aficionado could confirm this, exercise is a great way to stimulate production of all those natural endorphins.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2020 19:12:23 GMT
My definition would be someone who recogises that it causes him depression and lethargy but carries on regardless. You've been banging on about what a big problem depression is and there you are self inflicting it. Exactly...it's your definition. It's people like you who drive one to drink. I think alcohol, like most drugs, just amplifies how you feel at the time. I don't drink to deal with depression, it's just that (again like most drugs) there is a down patch when you come off it. I drink because I enjoy it. The problems start when you drink because you 'have to' rather than 'want to'. A good indicator is whether the individual has a good appetite or not. An alcoholic usually gets the majority of calories from the booze so they don't feel like eating. BTW, I don't think I 'bang on' about depression, but I do believe our mental state has a massive bearing on our physical state. So many people die soon after they give up mentally.
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Post by lollygagger on Jun 7, 2020 19:55:49 GMT
It comes down to whether you think the ups are worth the downs in the end. You do, I don't.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2020 20:23:49 GMT
It comes down to whether you think the ups are worth the downs in the end. You do, I don't. I think it's more about personality. The highs and lows might be there before the alcohol. I have family members who were diagnosed with manic depression. I think I could easily have gone that way except for a good bit advice I got which was to concentrate on controlling the highs rather than deal with the lows. Control the highs, then the lows aren't so bad. I don't like to drink when I'm low as it would make me feel worse. However having a drink when I'm getting high helps dumb things down a bit. I suppose I could have taken prescribed drugs in the past...but that's boring and not as sociable. Anyway, I bow to anyone who can enjoy life to it's full without taking any form of drug. They are a better person than me.
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Post by naughtyfox on Jun 7, 2020 20:26:05 GMT
When we met bassplayer he seemed quite normal and cheery and friendly. This is the image I shall keep. Perhaps he needs a hobby. Beer mat collecting?
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2020 20:34:06 GMT
It comes down to whether you think the ups are worth the downs in the end. You do, I don't. I think it's more about personality. The highs and lows might be there before the alcohol. I have family members who were diagnosed with manic depression. I think I could easily have gone that way except for a good bit advice I got which was to concentrate on controlling the highs rather than deal with the lows. Control the highs, then the lows aren't so bad. I don't like to drink when I'm low as it would make me feel worse. However having a drink when I'm getting high helps dumb things down a bit. I suppose I could have taken prescribed drugs in the past...but that's boring and not as sociable. Anyway, I bow to anyone who can enjoy life to it's full without taking any form of drug. They are a better person than me. I've got depression in the blood but somehow managed to avoid getting it properly. Older sister bipolar and been on several sections since our mum killed herself, cousin killed herself, two uncles the same way, younger sister has a clinically depressed husband and two very small children, my woman is a nutter, aunt is a headcase. I don't know how I survived it really. It's enough to turn you to drink! And it did in my case although I have been a regular for much more than 5 years the last five years have been somewhat worse in terms of units per day. Oh well as someone once said "Everyone has to believe in something. I believe I will have another beer". As for prescribed drugs no way José that is what killed my mother - the dreaded Venlafaxine made her hang herself. Horrible really. That plus my younger sister insisting that she took her happy pills when she knew they weren't working. And NHS fuckups etc etc blah blah blah too depressing
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2020 20:40:25 GMT
I think it's more about personality. The highs and lows might be there before the alcohol. I have family members who were diagnosed with manic depression. I think I could easily have gone that way except for a good bit advice I got which was to concentrate on controlling the highs rather than deal with the lows. Control the highs, then the lows aren't so bad. I don't like to drink when I'm low as it would make me feel worse. However having a drink when I'm getting high helps dumb things down a bit. I suppose I could have taken prescribed drugs in the past...but that's boring and not as sociable. Anyway, I bow to anyone who can enjoy life to it's full without taking any form of drug. They are a better person than me. I've got depression in the blood but somehow managed to avoid getting it properly. Older sister bipolar and been on several sections since our mum killed herself, cousin killed herself, two uncles the same way, younger sister has a clinically depressed husband and two very small children, my woman is a nutter, aunt is a headcase. I don't know how I survived it really. It's enough to turn you to drink! And it did in my case although I have been a regular for much more than 5 years the last five years have been somewhat worse. I think the body usually follows the mind, but that is just my pet theory, I'm no expert. It's amazing how some people conquer physical ailments by trying to be positive. Hanging around with depressing people often has the opposite effect. Again just a pet theory.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2020 21:15:22 GMT
I've got depression in the blood but somehow managed to avoid getting it properly. Older sister bipolar and been on several sections since our mum killed herself, cousin killed herself, two uncles the same way, younger sister has a clinically depressed husband and two very small children, my woman is a nutter, aunt is a headcase. I don't know how I survived it really. It's enough to turn you to drink! And it did in my case although I have been a regular for much more than 5 years the last five years have been somewhat worse. I think the body usually follows the mind, but that is just my pet theory, I'm no expert. It's amazing how some people conquer physical ailments by trying to be positive. Hanging around with depressing people often has the opposite effect. Again just a pet theory. It must be some vocation to be a counsellor. Listening to somebody whine about their problems is always a drag, so I think there's something in your pet theory. I wonder what percentage of professional drivers sink into alcohol abuse? I depended on my licence for a living for many years. It sure makes you think about it. Also, when I did get a tad drunk I often had the feeling that I had handicapped myself - if the need to drive somewhere arose, I couldn't.
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Post by JohnV on Jun 7, 2020 21:24:30 GMT
For all the time I was in The Merchant Navy I had one fixed rule about alcohol ...... none at sea .... ever, and that included Christmas Day, New Years Eve etc. I could get wasted in port, if I should so desire but never ever at sea.
edit to add that is not totally correct ...... I should have said, once I was no longer a second
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2020 21:30:05 GMT
I think the body usually follows the mind, but that is just my pet theory, I'm no expert. It's amazing how some people conquer physical ailments by trying to be positive. Hanging around with depressing people often has the opposite effect. Again just a pet theory. It must be some vocation to be a counsellor. Listening to somebody whine about their problems is always a drag, so I think there's something in your pet theory. I wonder what percentage of professional drivers sink into alcohol abuse? I depended on my licence for a living for many years. It sure makes you think about it. Also, when I did get a tad drunk I often had the feeling that I had handicapped myself - if the need to drive somewhere arose, I couldn't. You bring up a good point actually about being over the limit when an emergency occurs. I suppose there is always the option of a taxi. One of the annoying things about doing pub gigs is dealing with people who get pissed when you have to stay sober so you can drive home. Mind you if they didn't get pissed, we probably wouldn't get paid . .
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Post by quaysider on Jun 7, 2020 23:29:37 GMT
I drink for Every reason..... tonight it is because I'm depressed - or I'm drunk BECAUSE I'm depressed which has made me depressed. I also drink when I'm happy ... it's very confusing - although the tears down my face at THIS point, indicate I'm sad... and drunk... and want to drink more to either forget whatever I'm sad about or pass out
it's very complicated.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2020 23:40:12 GMT
I drink for Every reason..... tonight it is because I'm depressed - or I'm drunk BECAUSE I'm depressed which has made me depressed. I also drink when I'm happy ... it's very confusing - although the tears down my face at THIS point, indicate I'm sad... and drunk... and want to drink more to either forget whatever I'm sad about or pass out it's very complicated. Well you come over as a nice bloke. So hopefully it will work out in the end.....hic...
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Post by quaysider on Jun 8, 2020 6:46:48 GMT
I'm sober this morning - I think mental health is becoming more acceptable to discuss publicly these days ... that has to be a good thing. I'm not embarrassed at sharing my feelings about things ... we ALL have shit to deal with but so long as we can all be concerned about OTHER people's crap (perhaps above our own) then the world will continue to be decent place... which, fundamentally it actually is....
GOODNESS is all around - it's just that it doesn't make a song and dance about it's presence... quietly poddling along in the background with little acts of kindness, understanding and empathy making MASSIVE differences to someone's world.
I know that may sound a bit wet, but as none of us can ever really know what's going on inside someones head, i do air (err?) on the side of caution for the most part - well unless someones a total knob... and even then, I can't help but wonder WHY they are a knob and if there is any way I can ease their demons.
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